July 2012
4 posts
“If you’re a “nice guy” to a girl up until you realize she doesn’t want to date you, then go on about how she’s a cold shrew that friendzoned you and how no girls date nice guys, like, nah mate, girls do date nice guys. You just aren’t a nice guy. You’re a passive aggressive beta with internalized misogyny and a serious victim complex.”
—(via theneverbird)
5 Things I'm Not Here For →
steenfox.tumblr.com
This is a Tumblr challenge issued by Steen (@steenfox) and I am always down for a rant. There are many things I am in no way, shape or form here for, but this is only five:
1.) I am not here for your hype.
Yes, your hype. Whatever banality it is you are all extra excited about, I would like you turn it down from a 10 to about a 3. Maybe a 4 if it’s Tuesday and I’m feeling generous. Look, I give no fucks at all about your new-found or revitalized love for Frank Ocean, blue lipstick, your Twitter clique or any other of your causes d’jour. I DO NOT CARE. I request that you shut the entire hell up and give all of us within your reach a break. Your excitement is infectious in the same way that tuberculosis is and equally enjoyable. Turn your CAPS LOCK off and sit your ass down. I’m never here for it.
2.) I’m not here for your shade.
No, truly I’m not. SERIOUSLY. I’m laughing, but I’m for real. Primarily, I’m not here for it because I am unable to recognize it. I can’t recognize it because you didn’t say it to me. As in, you didn’t call my name. Anything about me not said to me doesn’t exist. But past that, I don’t know. Say you do call my name? What the hell am I supposed to do? Say many things to prove to you that I’m right and you’re wrong? Cry? I don’t know. So, I’m just not here for it.
3.) I’m not here for these raggedy ass power cords for the Macbook Pro from Apple.
I think Steve Jobs took the secret to making a cord that won’t fall apart within a year of buying it. And he ain’t shit for that. I’ve had my MBP for two and a half years and I am on my 2nd power cord. This second power cord is in SHAMBLES. This thing looks like my beloved kitty-child Lily has been using it for a chew toy. It’s broke down, bombed out and depleted. Yet, it is STILL fully functional! I want Steve Jobs to know over in the Great Beyond, he needs to send a message to whomever he left in charge of his vast Apple empire that they’d better come up with a power cord for these exceptional machines that doesn’t fall apart in 6 weeks time. Hell, and got the NERVE to be $80 a pop! I am not here for that, Steve Jobs!
4.) I’m not here for Weak Women.
I’m not here for weak people in general, but I have special non-presence for weak women. I. CANNOT. STAND. YOU. I really dislike everything about you. You are so damn wack. Won’t stand for shit so you fall for anything. Girl, bye. You make me uncomfortable and I do not understand you. You worry my spirit and you make me not want to associate with you at all. And not because you are bad person, but because I can’t respect you. I see you and I see a chink in the armor. You can’t be on my team, with your decrepit and crumbling facade. Get a set of Legos and build yourself a backbone. I’m not here for you.
5.) I’m not here for these lists!
Steen! This is your fault! It took me an hour to get this done. I hate so many things! How was I supposed to be whittle it down to five?? OK, ok…It’s not your fault, Steen. I’ve been drinking for the last 45 minutes. I’m becoming more and more incoherent in my own mind as each minute/sip passes. It took me 15 minutes to get this last “I’m not here for this” point made.
So, I’m done cuz I’m not here for it.
