Little Dirty Pretty Thangs

onlinecounsellingcollege:

1.    Is this a person who always puts you down? A friend is someone who accepts you as you are – and allows you to be different, and to think for yourself, and to make your own decisions – without an explanation. However, if a person is demeaning or always puts you down, criticises your opinions, or the way you dress or look, then that’s someone to avoid as they’re a toxic friend.

2.    Do they gossip about you? A friend is someone you can totally trust. You can share your deepest secrets, and say what’s on your mind – and they won’t tell a person or betray your trust. However, if you always have to watch what you say around a friend, as they’re likely to gossip or let a secret slip, then it’s likely that this person is a toxic friend.

3.    Do they constantly mock and make fun of you? A bit of gentle ribbing shows affection between friends. But if they’re always making fun of you, or highlighting your faults, or attacking you in public, then they’re not a genuine friend.

4.    How do you feel after being with your friend? Think about your answers to the following:

-      Do you feel defensive when you spend time with them?

-      Do you feel hurt or upset after spending time with them?

-      Do you feel as if you always have to justify yourself instead of being “natural” around your friend?

-      Do you enjoy their company or do you feel ambivalent?

-      Do they undermine your confidence and self-esteem?

-      Do you feel attacked and used after spending time with them?

-      Does the friendship feel unbalanced and require a lot of work?

-      Is it more a competition than a genuine friendship?

Note: If you recognize the signs of a toxic friend, then it’s time to move on and find a different friend. Being with this individual will wreak your happiness.

basseyworld:

The Siwe Project’s first annual No Shame Day will be held on July 2, the first Monday of National Minority Mental Health Month. We are asking people to publicly share their mental health journeys or speak as allies for loved ones in their lives.

The Siwe Project, a global non-profit dedicated to promoting mental health awareness throughout the international black community is launching a campaign that focuses on stigma reduction through storytelling and community building. Though The Siwe Project gears its efforts mainly toward people of African descent, we do realize that mental illness is an issue that affects EVERYONE and we hope that the first annual No Shame Day will be an opportunity for people of all nationalities, all around the world, to rally around mental health care. The Siwe Project website will host candid discussions about mental illness stigma, diagnoses, and treatment options. The purpose of No Shame Day is to encourage more people to seek treatment without shame.

Here’s where you come in: The Siwe Project believes that sharing stories not only fosters individual healing, but community transformation. The Siwe Project strategically uses new  safe spaces to share new stories. To that end, we’re looking for bloggers (with their own blogs) YouTubers and podcasters to share their personal experiences with mental health for No Shame Day to open the dialogue on a broader public scale. If you’re interested in blogging, video blogging or hosting a podcast about your or a loved ones mental health journey, please email Bassey Ikpi at b.ikpi@thesiweproject.org.

Bassey Ikpi,  the organization’s founder, has chronicled her illness for a variety of outlets such as Essence, The Huffington Post, XOJane.com and The Root. Please join her in keeping the conversation going by lending your voice to the cause. Let your readership know that when it comes to seeking help for mental health issues, there is No Shame.